Grapefruits: The chubby cousin of oranges.

  G to the R to the A to the P to the E now to the F to the R to the U to the I to the T to the S.

 Grapefruits.

   This is sort of a stupid post but grapefruits are probably the most misunderstood fruits, besides lemons. I always put a bunch of sugar on them. So is that like making them fake. Like a Ke$ha fruit? You know, like maybe a bunch of sugar is kind of like all the glitter and make-up. And they're like chubby. They're like the obese oranges of the world. That kind of makes me sad. It's like all the sugar we put on them makes them fat. That makes me feel like I should be putting less sugar on them. But that would make my tongue depressed.


  Anyway, should my tongue or should obese oranges be sad?

  Comment!

R.I.P.

   Today I wanted to talk about something serious. With all the death and shootings lately, 2013 is off to a hellish start. It seems as if death is in the air.

   I had only experienced what deaths aftermath felt like once. R.I.P Jerry Carter.
   I had another experience today. One of the seventh graders at my school passed away. No one knows what happened except that it was suicide. I didn't know her very well. I had seen her around school a few times. A few minutes before she killed herself, she wrote on facebook, "I love you guys." There was a rumor that she also wrote "goodbye for now." But that wasn't true. She passed  on Saturday, The 23rd.

   It just makes you realize how precious life is. One action and it's gone.

  "As cliche as it sounds, live life to it's fullest." -Ryan Higa.

  "Gotta live like we're dying." -Kris Whats-his-face.

   If you are thinking about ending life, thinking that it will solve all your problems, it won't. If you feel like no one cares, you are so, so wrong. The girl who committed suicide, maybe thought no one cared. Do you know how many kids had to go to counseling? Do you know how the teachers reacted? My teacher tried to explain it's okay to be sad. She had to turn away because she couldn't speak she cried so hard. Do you know how many kids wore blue in support of this girl? About 500 kids wore blue, including me. 
   If you still think no one cares, I care. I don't want you to end your life. You will most likely live until you're eighty.
   I can't go on. This is painful.
  I don't want to see anyone else go through what this girl went through.
   

                        R.I.P Ashley.

   Meh Wuvz, you guys. Remember that.
  

Dude, I really don't want to see that. On commercials.

      Hey Guys. So you know those commercials that are anti-smoking. It's a good message for smokers to see what their lungs look like. But non-smokers like me don't want to see open heart surgery or some sh*t like that on TV. What if I'm eating?
                                                      *Sets the scene.*

     Le me sitting at the table whilst eating a waffle.

     Le me watching Spongebob.

     Le me chewing waffle.

                              *Open lung or some sh*t like that shows on TV.*

     Le me looking at TV.          
 
                                                 *Two seconds later*

     Le me sitting in front of toilet, vomiting guts out.

                                                   *Curtains Close*

       See that. Bulimia in it's true form.


     Anyways, I think they're good messages for smokers. But I don't want that stuff interrupting my Spongebob time.

                                      What Dish Network should do:

   Use Google maps earth and the U.S. Army tracking down smokers and only sending commercials to smokers. Putting 50 billion more into the National Debt. -Romney's America.
               Sorry to my Republican readers.

  k bye. Wuvz meh rehders. Follow me on Twitter @natcami.

Snickers: Because you're not you when you're hungry

         Ok, to get this straight. I am me when I'm hungry. I'm not all like,
 "I'm hungry, so I'm going to become Joe Biden." I'm hungry a lot. Like when I raid the fridge and the only thing in there is mushrooms. I will starve until my parents go to the store and buy real food. Yet while I wait, for some reason I'm not in the White House. False advertising, Snickers. What if someone starved themselves and were all like,
  "I'm gonna starve myself until I become a roll of toilet paper."

    See. Snickers is starving people. That's called anorexia, people.

          Snickers: Causing starvation and obesity since 1930.


*Not bashing Snickers. Way too yummy to bash :)

k bye.

CSI.

    CSI (Crime Scene Investigation) is a show about, well, I'll just simplify it, theoretically shows fictional murderers and how the CSI caught them.


     So I am totally, anti-drug, anti-murder, and of course, anti-dollar store toilet paper. When I go to the bathroom I wanna feel like I wiped fully and not pained down there. Not the point. I love CSI. Amazing show. But disturbing. It's like Honey Boo Boo's mom, Swiper from Dora, a murderer, and a nature show all got together and said, "Let's create a crime show, that shows how they murdered someone, and got caught." - The trio that were later convicted of attempted robbery. (They never commited robbery, any of them. I mean Swiper always tried but never succeeded. God, he must have like what, 128 felonies?)


  I'm not trying to get the show stopped, but I couldn't think of anything else to blog about, ok? I have a competition tomorrow and quite a lot of my rep is at stake. So I'm just studying and hoping I win.


  k bye. ERMAGHERD! Wuvz meh rehders.

Promoting blogs I love!

     Hey guys. So I was looking through my blog (because I had nothing better to do, duh), and I was all like,
                                                    *Singing*
  *Du du du du du Dora, Du du du du du Dora, Dora, Dora, Dora, The Explorer.*

    So later I was like, "I haven't promoted any blogs! So I think I'll do that now."

    *Le hitting the pencil button.* *Le starts writing* *Le aldsfla* *Le pushes cat off of keyboard*


   Ok, so here is a list which may be updated in the future.

• Kyra's Awesome Blog (Supernatural & Buffy fans will love."
• Krypto's Blog
• Amy's Blog
• Kyra's Poetry Blog
• Ruby's Epic Blog (Psych fans will love)
• Aubrey's Random Blog
• Family Pet Blog

   k bye. Ermagherd! Wuv meh rehders. <---- Looks a bit like the word Reddit, doesn't it? Don't know what Reddit is? It's like an older version of Myspace.

Yugoslavia.

       Hey guys. So today I literally learned there was a country named Yugoslavia. Older readers may know this but as a 2000's child, I had no freaking idea that there was a country called Yugoslavia.

      While I was trying to find a picture on a map, it's so old I couldn't find any pictures with real (not made up) words.

      So whilst (I'm so smart) I wait for my slow computer to load, I must improvise.
                                             *   Sings   *
 I love you, you love me, lets get together and kill Barney. With an arrow to the-
    
               Yay it loaded!
So I searched up a pic of a 'Yugo'.


    So a Yugo is a car made in Lithuania. Just kidding. It's made in Turkey. Anyway, you can guess where it comes from.

Fun fact: The Yugo was featured on Time's worst cars of all time.



    *I'm really tired, not because it's late, because of school. So I just wanted to say that because I haven't posted for a bit. And I've been busy. So yeah. And stuff.   k bye. Sorry if this hasn't been a quality post. Read my honey boo boo and dora posts if you're looking for comedy.

You Just Got Meme'd (Grumpy Cat)

   Grumpy Cat is a cat who you can tell from the name, is, indeed, very joyful.

Just kidding. He is, like, really depressed and should probably be on anti-depressants. Seriously, his face is like saddening.

   Mock Fry meme. Hehe.





k bye.

Age Limitations

     Whoever invented age limits was just plain old stupid. How dare you tell me I can't go on Thomas The Train? How dare you tell me I am too young to ride the Stratosphere in Las Vegas?

     Why can't I go on the train ride through the animal sanctuary?
     Why do you tell me that I can't go into that bouncy castle? I don't have a knife. I'm not going to pop the damn castle. And now you're telling me I might scare the kids? THOSE KIDS NEED A ROLE MODEL. And now you're calling security, wow, tough guy aren't you? And as those security guards "escort" me out, I will give you my well used middle finger, Mr. Bouncy Castle Manager Guy.


     I mean, I understand you want to keep kids safe from weirdo pervs. But I'm not a perv. So let me on the freaking Spongebob rollercoaster.

HOLY FREAKING CRAP!

         

       It's Friday. Yay!! I thought it was yesterday, but I was wrong. But it's Friday today! I bet you are thinking, "Why is this girl blogging about Friday it happens a lot." Well good-questioned person, it's because it's the end of the trimester!

*Trimester is like a semester but a little shorter and there's three of them.



         

                                 Anyway, YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!


                   And there isn't school on Monday, so another YAAAAAAAAAAAY!




(enthusiastic k bye.) so enthusiastic im going to change k yay so,


yay bye.

Why Mardi Gras is way better that Valentines Day

   Mardi Gras (Fat Tuesday) is a lot better than Valentines Day. Heres why:



    Valentines day sucks for forever aloners.
    You can wear costumes during Mardi Gras.
    If you haven't a valentine, then you walk around all sad that other girls have huge teddy bears.
    Mardi Gras isn't depressing.
    You can be alone on Mardi Gras and no one cares.

 k bye.

And remember, I love all of my readers.

What do you mean 'Presidential Fitness'?

      If you are in school then you know what Presidential Fitness is. It's a high standard of how many sit-ups, push-ups and running a mile and some other crap.


                     O.K, so now to complain about 'Presidential Fitness'.

    What kind of kids do you test? Ones with huge muscles? I mean, I have Presidential on 3 of these things, but seriously, I wanted to crawl into a hole afterwards. Who the freak wants to run a mile in nine minutes? Tell me dammit!
I mean, I understand how 72 million Americans are overweight. But why take it out on kids who aren't? Will 50 sit-ups change that? Or 20 push-ups? It won't. Sorry but it's true.

                                     What will change obesity rates.

                        Stop serving freaking 32 oz soft drinks. And yeah.


                            k bye.

Dear Apple,

      
   I thought you were a banana.
 And I was all like:

Just kidding :).


       Dear Apple,

                         Y U KEEP MAKING NEW STUFF?
                         
                     I bought my iPod Touch 4 a few years ago, around when it came out. Since then, about four iPads came out and three iPhones and one iPod. That is eight new products. That would all cost around $2,000 total. Haven't you heard about the National Debt Crisis? The Greek guys were like, "Oh! A new iPad! Must. Buy. Now." You know what that is. Hypnotism. So yeah. I'm done.

 Wanna read more about what it's like owning an Apple Product?
   Click the link below. It's Awesome. k bye.
http://theoatmeal.com/comics/apple
   

DA TURD? On Nyan Cat.

     Nyan Cat is a YouTube video made in 2011.

Click here to see original video

                                           A short description of Nyan Cat.

     Nyan Cat is a cat who sh*ts rainbows, the body of a poptart, and a cat head. This isn't freaking Ancient Egypt. And he has his own Wikipedia page. WTF? I'm an actual person living on this earth and I don't have a Wikipedia page. This isn't fair. And now the kids of our generation are growing up thinking, "Oh that rainbow is so pretty, but where the crap is Nyan Cat? I bet he's at the end of the rainbow." Thus, killing leprechauns. What do people have against leprechauns? All they do is come out once a year and pinch-. O.K I see your guys' points but it's still not nice leprechauns don't kill people. So now your comparing Leprechauns and Nyan Cat in your head.

                      

We all know these kind of people...

      That person who breaks up with their boyfriend and then get back together every twenty seconds.

      That hysterical person who makes dirty jokes.

      That bossy, annoying person who acts like you should bow down to them.

      That dumb person who doesn't have any common sense.

      That person who's highlight of the day is when someone farts.

      That awesome person who you love hanging out with.

      That person who could tell Chuck Norris jokes all day.

      That person who loves chocolate.

      That person who is in style.

      That lonely person who blogs even though barely anybody reads their blog, But loves the readers who do.

       Admit it, you know someone to describe every one of these sentences.

A Comparison Of Honey Badger and Barney Stinson.

          Barney Stinson and the Honey Badger are some of the most entertaining people I've ever watched.

       *Fun fact: For my bro, Kyra, I got her a Honey Badger don't care T-shirt.
                             
                                                 A Quick Comparison:

         Honey Badger can eat poisonous snakes
         If Barney Stinson ate a poisonous snake, well he's not Chuck Norris, let's just say that.

         Barney Stinson is Broda.

        Honey Badger Don't Care.

        I said it would be a quick post. But I just wanted to have more space to put some memes into the post.

k bye.

DA TURD? On Barney & Friends

     Barney & Friends is a kids show that ran from 1992 to 2010. Once again, very disturbing show.

                                  A short description of Barney & Friends.
 
     O.K., so imagine a huge purple dinosaur with an over-sized face who smiles way to freaking much. Who the f*ck smiles that much?
    
   



               And in the logo: It shows Barney leading them somewhere. Don't you see? He was leading them to the mountains to eat them. How do you think his mouth got so f*cking big? He was a cannibal, duh. Plus one of the Barneys' was arrested for cussing out a kid.
*Yes, there were around 4 Barneys'
      IT'S MEME TIME.

    
k bye.

Why turtles are cooler than people.

     Why turtles are cooler than people:

     -They aren't dramatic like people.
     -They are so chill.
     -They just swim around and eat.
     -They have a mini house on their back. That's why there aren't homeless turtles.
     -They're all like,"I'm going to chill in my tiny house and maybe eat some lettuce.
     -Because they're just so awesome.


      Why people are not as cool as turtles:

     -People are dramatic.
     -People litter.
     -People make other people like the Kardashians.
     -People are cruel to animals and other people.
     -People just aren't as cool as turtles.

What do you DA TURD About?

    To my amazingly awesome audience,

   Thank you for supporting and reading my blog. I love you guys so much! As you have read, DA TURD is a popular subject. So I decided that I would let you guys comment what you think I should DA TURD about. If I like your idea. I will use it and make a link to your blog.


                                                                                         Sincerely, Natalie

DA TURD? On Fear Factor

     Fear Factor is a show that ran from 2001-2006 and 2011-Present. It is a truly disturbing show. They eat scorpions, spiders and buffalo you-know-whats. They go bobbing for undomesticated rats.

    Still don't have the picture? Well imagine Jersey Shore mixed with a nature show and the Food Network. If you win the show, you get $50,000.

    If you have guts, and want glory, then buy a Ram Truck. You thought I was going to say go on Fear Factor didn't you? Well you are wrong. If you are a hobo with no food and have a pet rhinocorn that you need to feed. (A mixture of a rhino and unicorn.) Then go on Fear Factor.

   *Fun fact: My iPods name is Rhinos are just obese unicorns :)

*I couldn't find any memes so I just got pics.

k bye.

    
     

You don't see that everyday. *Cheesy blog post title. Check*

     Do you have a bucket list? You know, like stuff to do/see/be before you die. I hate to use that word, you know, die. It's scary to think about, in reality, so I'll just call it Pentium 4. So you sort of list stuff that you want to do before you go to Computer Heaven. When I was younger, I had a sort of weird one. The first one was to see a rabbi in a mankini. I was weird, k? But I had this idea to write about it because I say a guy in a suit j-running across the street from the LDS church. Then I started thinking about the rabbi in the mankini. And then I started thinking about bucket lists. Then, I was all like, "I must blog!" Then I saw a tree and started thinking about muffins. Then I was like, "I shall have cake when I get home." Then I fell asleep. And that was my day. Yay!

Everyday I'm meming...

k bye.

My Cat, Miko

    I thought it would be cool if I mentioned my cat. I have a cat named Miko. She likes sprite and salmon. She likes to eat hair and drink out of the toilet. She also enjoys going to the park, howling at other cats, sit in anything she can fit in, and sleep in open drawers and beanbags. I know this wasn't a funny post, but I just wanted to talk about my cat for a moment.

What am I going to put next in this post?

"memes"

I can't hear you!

"MEMES"

OHHHHHH...................

<- My cat sorta looks like this...

k bye.

DA TURD? On Dance Moms

     Dance Moms is a reality TV show where their kids dance at Abby Lee's Dance Company, one of the best dance places in the country. Their kids' range from the ages of 5-14. And is kind of looped into Honey Boo Boo and Jersey Shore categories.
*If you are an Amazon Prime member, you can watch the first season for free.

                                   A Short Description of Dance Moms

    Dance Moms is called Dance Moms because these moms are psychotic when it comes Ms. Abby. if they mess something up. These kids are amazing dancers. And she treats them like that gum you picked up on the bottom your shoe last Thursday. And the moms are always like to Abby, "I don't pay you 15,000 dollars a year to judge my girls, ya da ya da ya da." And when I say shes mean, I mean like she has no sympathy. Someone doesn't point their toes, "You are a disgrace to this company. You shouldn't even be rated on the pyramid. You never learn. Blah Blah Blah." Anyway here are some memes.

k bye.

DA TURD? On Jersey Shore

     Jersey Shore is a controversial show that ran on MTV which ran through 2009 and 2012.
                                           
                                      A short description of Jersey Shore...
      It's about drunk, psycho, uneducated, druggies who fight each other. Sh*t, they could be in the f***ing Hunger Games. Since I have only seen short clips of the show I cannot describe much of it. But let's just say that I'm glad it's over. But if you didn't know, Snooki (Nicole Polizzi) is pregnant. I believe that is why they ended the show. That poor kid. He'll be known as the kid with the drunk mom. Couldn't Snooki at least gone into hiding and changed her identity. I would say she could have plastic surgery done, but she probably has had so much plastic surgery that she couldn't have anything redone. (BURN SNOOKI HA!)

    Still haven't gotten the images? Well heres some memes...

 k bye.